Boy + Pink (does not) = GAY

When I saw this post entitled My Son is Gay, written by the parent of a five-year-old boy who wanted to dress as Daphne from Scooby Doo (and the flack adults gave her), it not only made me furious, but it reminded me of a post I wrote almost two years ago about my own son.

So I dug it up from my archives and decided to re-post it. In light of all the gay bullying going on, I think both of our posts stand the test of time.

Here it is:

My little guy is the sweetest. He's a hugger and very loving. I wouldn’t trade that for the world. So I want to cherish him and his gentle disposition as long as possible.

He has varied interests like all kids do. He likes shiny, shimmery stuff, like mommy’s jewelry, and always touches and samples the pieces I make out of my home business. He also creates his own jewelry from string and beads, and proudly wears it. But he also loves Star Wars, Legos, dinosaurs, Sponge Bob, and wrestling with his daddy.


He’s not picky about what he wears to school. There was only a handful of times that he wanted to wear something specific like his bright orange crocs or his bright yellow polo short because he said it was fancy.

Speaking of fancy, they read the FANCY NANCY book at school and were having a tea party the next day. My son was very excited about it.

He decided to wear a “fancy” shirt for the event.

When I picked him up from school I was told that the tea party went well and that the girls were brought costumes and hats to wear. My son was beaming, told me all about it, and said he was allowed to wear one of the purple outfits.

So now I come to my point. I think without realizing it, we adults help shape our boys and girls. Yeah, there are things that are definitely inherent in them. Boys are generally more active and use large motor skills. Girls are generally better with fine motor skills, and enjoy crafts and "mothering" dolls early on. But there are exceptions on both sides.

I think the teachers should have brought the boys costumes too. But they probably didn’t think about. Thankfully they're good teachers and let him choose one.

Here’s another example. At our haircut place, the kids get a prize at the end of the cut. My son turns a handle on this machine and out pops a prize. The prize this last time was a sparkly bracelet. He was thrilled. The women behind the counter saw her "mistake" and quickly tried taking it back from him. She offered him the boy’s prize instead- a train whistle. She apologized profusely to me. This stunned me. Did she think I'd be angry?

Anyway, I asked my son to pick b/w the two prizes. What do you think he picked? That’s right, the sparkly bracelet, which he promptly put on his wrist.
Now, I'm not saying I haven't also been conditioned to think this way. We all are, call it generational or societal. It just happens!

The other day my son came home wearing a clip with a feather attached that he “made”. He wanted to wear it out to dinner that night and for a moment I winced (mainly b/c other people can be cruel). I had to ask myself what the big deal was. He did end up wearing it, and the earth did not cave in!
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So what has my son taught me about life? Chill out, and enjoy making memories, because these moments are fleeting. Also, no matter what comes your way, you will get through it. THERE ARE WORSE THINGS THAN YOUR CHILD FAVORING A "GIRL" TOY for God's sake!

After all, boys like sparkly and shiny things too, and maybe even the colors pink and purple!

They like to dress up and act things out. What’s so wrong with that?


And if my child ends up being gay? I will cherish him as FIERCELY as I do now (maybe even more so).


I just happen to be LUCKY enough to have two gay relatives in my life!

Why am I lucky? Because without them, I wouldn't have a CLUE about resilience, tenacity, acceptance, and unfortunately--how very cruel the world can be!

THANK YOU S. and A.--for showing me what unconditional love really is!