Oh Sandy!

You blew through town and took our fence with you!

You closed the schools, cancelled Halloween, knocked down trees and power lines, and were a force to be reckoned with.

We're still recovering over here, but some have it much, much worse. :-(((

So to those of you suffering: my thoughts are with you and I'm wishing you well.

See you on the flip side. Have a good week!

Sweet Surrender

My favorite kind of novel probably includes the tension and longing that occurs right before that first kiss. I hold my breath every time the characters get just close enough for their lips to meet.

YA books (off the top of my head) that have done that to me: Anna and the French Kiss, Twilight, Matched, Divergent, Such A Rush, Shatter Me, Delirium, Perfect Chemistry (on and on).


So how about in real life? Crushing hard on someone from a distance, a first date that might end in a kiss, a long-distance military or on-line relationship.

Enter Andrew and Carissa. They met when they were seventeen-years-old, got married a couple years later, and waited until their wedding day to KISS! 


YEP, to kiss. There's a YA novel in there somewhere.

Talk about *yowza-wowza* fireworks going off every time their lips were in kissing distance of each other. On their wedding day, after the minister said the magic words, one of them burst into laughter going in for the kiss. I'm pretty sure that would be ME. The anticipation, the onlookers, the huge day itself.


Here's what Carissa said about holding off for that long: "As silly as it may sound, that kind of tension was actually quite romantic! It's sweet to me, when I recall how utterly in love we were and convinced of each other's hearts, that it hardly mattered what each other's mouths tasted like. That love has only gotten sweeter with time--but so does the kissing!"

Find their lovely interview, HERE--it garnered some outrage actually, which is just plain sad.  There are so many other things--WAY bigger things--to be upset about, why this?


So when you write your next big first kiss scene, think about Carissa and Andrew. XOXO


(images)

Eight Years Ago Today...

I kissed my baby boy's head for the first time.

He's grown into a smart, funny, kind, and sensitive little person. And my breathe still catches when I watch him sleep.

Because of the profound and joyful moments he's brought into my life.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, my big boy!

(see you next week)

Tragedy Writes Itself

We had a local school shooting this week. A seventeen-year-old teen opened fire in a school cafeteria and gunned down five students. Three of the boys who were life-flighted to the hospital have died. Two others are recovering. Had a brave teacher not chased the student out of the building--while being shot at--there may have been more fatalities. Soon after the teen fled the scene he sat alone on the side of the road waiting to be picked up by the police.

When I heard the local news, I burst into tears. As a parent, it's natural to fear that your child might experience something similar. And as a former teacher in a school district where drills were regular and necessary, I flashed back to the words code red, to locking the classroom door, and barricading the students beneath a table and away from windows.


In the aftermath of this tragedy there were dozens of TEEN interviews and I listened closely to the words and phrases those students used:


"It didn't feel real. It was like watching a movie."


"It sounded like firecrackers going off inside the building."

"I thought some kid had popped open a bag of chips."

"This is like a nightmare that you can't wake up from."

"I saw people running and screaming. But it didn't hit me until I heard the announcement that we were on lock down."

"He (the shooter) used to be a friend up until eighth grade. But then he went through a goth period and kept to himself."

"He (the shooter) was a nice kid. Very quiet. But you could always see sadness behind his eyes."




Tragedy is tragedy whether you're an adult or a teen. People go on auto-pilot until they can actually process what's going on. Some break down immediately but others require more time before it all sinks in.

And afterward we attempt to connect all the dots. But kids look to adults for how to handle things. What do they hearing us saying?

Here's some of what I heard from ADULTS: 

"That kid came from a broken home."

"He needs to fry for what he's done."

"Are we supposed to turn a blind eye and not judge him just because he had a horrible family life?"

"Maybe he was mentally unstable or depressed or bullied."

"Maybe all he needed was a friend."

What made this young man decide to ruin his life and the lives of others in THIS brutal way? What small actions could he and others have taken to help create a different outcome?

Totally makes me think of the book by Jay Asher called Thirteen Reasons Why. Small steps might make a difference. MIGHT.

So teach the child in your life to GIVE on a daily basis. A smile, a compliment, a helping hand, or their time. GIVING just might bridge the delicate line between life and death.


 And no, that 's not the complete answer. There are always others factors involved that make up the whole of a person (state of mind, mental health, family life, environment), BUT it's a start. And a start is all we've got.


(images, book)

That Nagging Feeling

The struggle to listen to and respect our own intuition is the greatest challenge of all. (Herb Goldberg)

Two times in the last three years, I received some big news directly related to following my intuition.

In each instance, I ignored my gut from the start. But because it was nagging me, I rectified the situation right before it blew up.

That's enough of a learning curve for me!

I share this with you, dear readers, to urge you to ALWAYS listen to your inner voice. It'll never steer you wrong.

It might feel like your end goal is further away, when actually the opposite is true. Had you just listened from the beginning...

It's a great lesson for your characters as well. *wink*
Keep dreaming, believing and growing!

Every human being has an attendant spirit; and wise are they who obey its signals. If it does not always tell us what to do, it always cautions us what not to do.
(Lydia M. Child)

ENJOY YOUR WEEKEND!

Rainy Days and Mondays...

So it's raining again. And I'm not just talking about a rainy afternoon or a sudden downpour. I'm talking days upon days of gray. A low pressure system is hovering over Lake Erie and won't leave. It's been this way for most of spring!

And sometimes this kind of weather has an insidious way of seeping into my brain, joining forces with my self-doubt, and bringing me way down.

But I can't let it. I won't let it!

So instead, I'll dream of these kinds of days ahead:
(photos via: just be splendid.tumblr.com and weheartit.com)

May your Monday be filled with hope and sunshine and smiles!

Happy Mother's Day!

There is no one who comes here that does not know this is a true map of the world, with YOU there in the center, making HOME for us all.
(storypeople)

Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of
having my heart outside my body.
Or how special it could feel
to hold a sleeping child.
I didn't understand the bond
that tethered our souls together.
Or that someone so small
could make me feel so significant and alive.

HAVE A LOVELY WEEKEND!

(merinews.com, kidzorg.blogspot.com, ablazingly.com)

A Royal Wedding of our OWN

Ten years ago, I walked down a winding staircase in a long white gown. When I got to the landing, I searched the bottom step and saw my future standing there.

He was handsome, compassionate, and kind.

My smile grew wide as my heart bounded against my chest. I couldn't get down there fast enough to reach for his hand...and I've never looked back.

Here's the poem read at our ceremony. It still gives me goose bumps.

I have opened unto you the wide gates of my being,

And like a tide you have flowed into me.

The innermost recesses of my spirit are full of you,

and all the channels of my soul are grown sweet with your presence.

For you have brought me peace.

The peace of great tranquil waters,

and the quiet of the summer sea.

Your hands are filled with peace as the noon tide is filled with light;

about your head is bound the eternal quiet of the stars,

and in your heart dwells the calm miracle of twilight.

I am utterly content.

In all my spirit is no ripple of unrest.

For I have opened unto you the wide gates of my being.

And like the tide you have flowed into me.

(Eunice Tietjens)
HAPPY TENTH ANNIVERSARY, BABY!

(Ahhhh- we have such baby faces!)

Are you watching the coverage of the Royal Wedding?

Can you feel the LOVE in the air? o.O

HAVE A LOVELY WEEKEND!

(theknot.com.au)

So...

Guess where I am right about NOW. Have you guessed yet?


We head there every year around this time.


It involves the ocean:


And sand:


Yep, to Sarasota, Florida. Can you hear the waves lapping at the shore yet?



See you in a week (I've left my comments off)!

What's In a Name?

Alternate title: What's up with YOUR name--is it Christine or Christina?

I'm asked that question so much, I thought I'd clear the air.

Plus it goes so well with my post from yesterday, about my parent's immigration to this country!


I was a surprise pregnancy and my mother was very ill during my birth (and for all of her years thereafter). Pair that with English as a second language and you kind of get the picture of how I was named. I figure, whoever helped my parents filled out my birth certificate may have been the one to spell my name CHRISTINE.

But all of my life, I heard my mother calling, "CHRISTINAaaaa...." or another European version of my name, but definitely always with an A on the ending. And somehow during my school years the name I used was "Chris"--do not even try it, despise despise despise!

Fast forward to college years when I looked at my birth certificate and realized there was no A on the end of my name. *pouty lip*

So CHRISTINE is my legal name, but CHRISTINA is the one I prefer, and definitely the name I want on my future novel! *fingers crossed*

Did I clear the air? :D

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND!

Coming Full Circle

It was about three years ago that I finally figured out what to do with my life: CREATE!

Stories and jewelry, that is. More stories than jewelry, by the way. :D

I was in my thirties and questioned what took me so dang long.


I thought about my 15 years as a child & family therapist, and special education teacher (really, they were nearly the same job, just different workloads), and wondered why I had wasted so much time.

I mean, I enrolled in a Master's program twice!

Sure, I'd always adored books but never imagined I was good enough to write.

I'd written boatloads of papers, reports, progress notes, and journal entries, and knew I was getting pretty darn good at stringing words together.

I once even put "author" as my dream job on one of those silly email chains, and later, when I saw a psychic for kicks and she told me I'd become a writer, I laughed at the absurdity of it.


Looking back, I'm grateful for the path I took, and that I'd honed those skills in previous careers. I mean, I know my family dynamics and mental health disorders like the back of my hand ( go ahead--ask me a question. Mental Health Mondays, maybe?).

It helps with world-building in my stories, and certainly helped when my son had learning issues last year. During that trying time, my husband told me how thankful he was for all of my knowledge in that concentrated area.

I guess it just takes some people longer to figure things out!

And that's okay. All of those experiences led me on my path to ME! It's been like an awakening.

Some days I still question my sanity and my choices, but people in my life tell me I'm the most settled I've ever been. Like a void's been filled.

And I am. Settled. And Happy.

How about you?

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND, EVERYBODY!

(powerfulintentions.org, awakeningresources.com, gapingvoid.com)

What I Meant to Say was...

I have a love/hate relationship with the auto correct on my iPhone.

If I turn it off, I want it back on, to help me text loooong words.

And when I have it on, it changes my words, resulting in crazy sentences. Grrr...

The other day, my niece asked if I meant to call her a HOE (word I was going for: HOPE).


So, of course, there's already a website dedicated to it:
http://www.damnyouautocorrect.com/


I go there to laugh my arse off:



DAMN YOU, AUTO- CORRECT!


LOL!

Boy + Pink (does not) = GAY

When I saw this post entitled My Son is Gay, written by the parent of a five-year-old boy who wanted to dress as Daphne from Scooby Doo (and the flack adults gave her), it not only made me furious, but it reminded me of a post I wrote almost two years ago about my own son.

So I dug it up from my archives and decided to re-post it. In light of all the gay bullying going on, I think both of our posts stand the test of time.

Here it is:

My little guy is the sweetest. He's a hugger and very loving. I wouldn’t trade that for the world. So I want to cherish him and his gentle disposition as long as possible.

He has varied interests like all kids do. He likes shiny, shimmery stuff, like mommy’s jewelry, and always touches and samples the pieces I make out of my home business. He also creates his own jewelry from string and beads, and proudly wears it. But he also loves Star Wars, Legos, dinosaurs, Sponge Bob, and wrestling with his daddy.


He’s not picky about what he wears to school. There was only a handful of times that he wanted to wear something specific like his bright orange crocs or his bright yellow polo short because he said it was fancy.

Speaking of fancy, they read the FANCY NANCY book at school and were having a tea party the next day. My son was very excited about it.

He decided to wear a “fancy” shirt for the event.

When I picked him up from school I was told that the tea party went well and that the girls were brought costumes and hats to wear. My son was beaming, told me all about it, and said he was allowed to wear one of the purple outfits.

So now I come to my point. I think without realizing it, we adults help shape our boys and girls. Yeah, there are things that are definitely inherent in them. Boys are generally more active and use large motor skills. Girls are generally better with fine motor skills, and enjoy crafts and "mothering" dolls early on. But there are exceptions on both sides.

I think the teachers should have brought the boys costumes too. But they probably didn’t think about. Thankfully they're good teachers and let him choose one.

Here’s another example. At our haircut place, the kids get a prize at the end of the cut. My son turns a handle on this machine and out pops a prize. The prize this last time was a sparkly bracelet. He was thrilled. The women behind the counter saw her "mistake" and quickly tried taking it back from him. She offered him the boy’s prize instead- a train whistle. She apologized profusely to me. This stunned me. Did she think I'd be angry?

Anyway, I asked my son to pick b/w the two prizes. What do you think he picked? That’s right, the sparkly bracelet, which he promptly put on his wrist.
Now, I'm not saying I haven't also been conditioned to think this way. We all are, call it generational or societal. It just happens!

The other day my son came home wearing a clip with a feather attached that he “made”. He wanted to wear it out to dinner that night and for a moment I winced (mainly b/c other people can be cruel). I had to ask myself what the big deal was. He did end up wearing it, and the earth did not cave in!
*******
So what has my son taught me about life? Chill out, and enjoy making memories, because these moments are fleeting. Also, no matter what comes your way, you will get through it. THERE ARE WORSE THINGS THAN YOUR CHILD FAVORING A "GIRL" TOY for God's sake!

After all, boys like sparkly and shiny things too, and maybe even the colors pink and purple!

They like to dress up and act things out. What’s so wrong with that?


And if my child ends up being gay? I will cherish him as FIERCELY as I do now (maybe even more so).


I just happen to be LUCKY enough to have two gay relatives in my life!

Why am I lucky? Because without them, I wouldn't have a CLUE about resilience, tenacity, acceptance, and unfortunately--how very cruel the world can be!

THANK YOU S. and A.--for showing me what unconditional love really is!

The Real ME

This post was inspired by Lourie who challenged me to let it all hang out.

And to my silly readers who complained they talk to an avatar of me and don't even know who I am (I DO have a real picture of me, on my About Me page)!


So here goes, the REAL me:

* The first thing I do every morning upon waking, is turn on the computer and coffee.

* The last thing I do before bed, is make sure our doggie is in our room, and my six-year-old is tucked in and breathing (an old habit from infancy days).

*Sometimes I encourage use of the computer, x-box, or television, to get a break from my active little boy (uh-huh, I said it).

*Since I work from home, I sometimes stay in my sweats all.day.long.

*I never iron (dryer and Downy Wrinkle Releaser spray, all the way) and up 'til a month ago, I didn't have a closet light (couldn't see a damn thing). But somehow, I still come off looking like a stylista (HA-mostly).

* I'd rather multi-task with emails and texts, than talk on the phone.

*I'm so sappy that I'll admit to sometimes looking for the cheesiest romantic comedy to watch (Hello, Lifetime and Disney).

*On the other hand, I like to watch really dark, or complex things as well (let's see: Dexter, The Sopranos, Six Feet Under, Big Love). I am so multi-dimensional :D.

*I probably only cook 3-4 days a week. The other days I subject my family to frozen dinners, cans of soup, and sandwiches.

* But I love this little snuggle bunny to pieces:



Who will join me in letting it all hang out?

Mind the Store...

...while I'm away?

Evan has a couple of days off from school, so we're heading to Michigan for a looong weekend!

See you on Tuesday!

The Collector

I always know a change in seasons is upon us when my six-year-old begins a new nature collection.


Here's how I know it's Autumn: Acorns all in a row (to help out the squirrels), and constant questions about how they store food for the winter.
Piles left everywhere, of fall leaves, cool sticks and buckeyes. Questions about why leaves change colors and random ones about whether this stick or that is a good length for Yoda to use.

I love it all and wouldn't trade it for the world.

I'm sure I collected things as a child, but for the life of me, can't really remember what.

How about you?

What Does MANY Hours of...

planning, cleaning, coordinating, clearing, set-up, comaraderie, and clean-up equal to?

A Kick-A** Autumn Clambake, that's what!

We live on one of those streets. You know the kind that has a "committee" for everything, a monthly book club and a guy's night out? Yes, one of those. And it's loads of fun!

We volunteered our back yard this year for the street clambake, which is a lot of work (let me repeat: a lot of work). But there were so many helping hands through the process.
There were about seventy attendees this year.

Here's a peek of the... BEFORE:

DURING:

and AFTER (lots of "leftovers"):


Per usual,we ended up around the fire pit, listening to the strum of guitars, while we sang along, drinks in hand. It was a pretty night, and a perfect fall celebration!

But I'm paying for it today:

Give and Take?

I posted this on Twitter last week and had some interesting responses.

So I'd like to hear your thoughts as well.

Here's what I wrote on Twitter after a back and forth email with a bloggy friend.

"Interesting email convo b/w me and a frustrated blogger/twitterer who's considering throwing in the towel. "

"The question she asked, 'Who do people beg you to follow them or read their latest post but have no intention of returning the favor?' "

"Interesting perspective she has. I don't think she's referring to agents (or bloggers who made it to the big time) b/c it would impossible given the # 's."

"Just other bloggers/twitterers/writers. Thoughts?"

*******************
Fellow blogger Ally said,

"Who ISN'T like that? Need to write 1st for you, then for loyal followers, even if it's only 2 of them. Crowds will come. :) Blog readers are smart and know when a blog is just for SEO/$ and when it is written with passion. It just takes time. "

Writer friend Leah said,

"Because I follow for content, not favors. I don't read blogs much and rarely comment. And why are they begging? They should want readers who are genuinely interested. Comments/visitors are great but it's the interaction and friendships that rule.
Meaning she/he should be less concerned about numbers and more 'is this post interesting.' "


***************


So there you have it.
I have been blogging for over two years. I began as a style blog (to coincide with my shopping column at the newspaper), but then made the switch to more general topics. Now I consider it a lifestyle blog. I like to talk about everything under the sun, including my writing. I think my followers consist of writers and moms and some fashionsitas, and I like that mix.

Two years ago, there wasn't a FOLLOWERS button. You just listed the blogs you liked on your sidebar and that was that. So things are definitely different, and I resisted putting my followers button up for a long time. Hey, change is hard ;--)

There IS unspoken blogging etiquette that if someone leaves a comment on your post, you should comment back.

Some people do it by email or in the comments section of their own blog. I visit the other person's blog and comment if they have a new post up that I haven't already commented on.

BUT, what if I had 50-100 comments everyday? THAT would be hard to pull off. I try to give my blog one hour of attention every day. If it goes above that it would be too hard to keep up with!

If you follow me, I more than likely follow back UNLESS Google limits the number of blogs I follow. When that happens, I re-evaluate who I'm following and sometimes unfollow others who I don't have a relationship with or I haven't visited in long while (because let's face it, interests change).

And I'm all right if someone does the same to me. No biggie. I don't want to be a numbers watcher. It becomes a drag!

WHAT SAY YOU? I want to know!


(latimeblogs.com)

The Last Days of Summer

It's the last few days before Evan begins first grade *sobs* and we're trying to make the most of our fleeting summer.

So we've stayed up late to do important things, like:
Using our telescope to look at the constellations...
...and the surface of the moon (so very cool)!

Camping in our backyard and eating s'mores...

...and catching fireflies so we can gaze at them with wonder.


Yeah, all of that!

*sigh* Goodbye summer break, you've been good to us!


(countryliving.com, firefly.org, howstuffworks.com, astrosurf.com)

Start Spreading the News...

...I'm leaving TODAY!

I want to be a part of it, New York... NEW YORK!


I'll be visiting old friends and favorite haunts! SO excited!


See you on Tuesday!